Share what’s in your heart, and your words will be a balm.
As soon
as you’re aware of the situation, take pen in hand and communicate your
heartfelt thoughts. Send it out in that very day’s mail, if at all possible.
Time is of the essence, as addressing the situation swiftly demonstrates your
genuine concern about the issue.
How to Write In A Sympathy Note
This is
not the time for email, text messaging, nor printing out your condolences on
computer paper. Go ahead and compose your thoughts in a word processor if you
like, but for the final draft, nothing gives the personal touch like a
handwritten message.
What to Say In A Sympathy Note
The
purpose of the sympathy letter is to acknowledge the sad event, express your
positive reflections about the deceased, perhaps share a fond memory or two
about the person, and offer your condolences and support however it’s needed.
Sympathy cards are saved for a lifetime, cherished along with other memorabilia
of the deceased. Your words will be treasured for a long time to come, so make
sure they are positive, encouraging words; words that bring comfort and peace
to one who has been through an extremely traumatic experience.
Speak not
only of your praises for the deceased, but for your devotion to the survivor.
This person likely feels scared and alone, and could use reassurance that
friendly, caring hearts are rallying around in support at this critical time.
What to Avoid When Writing A Sympathy Note or Letter
Unless
you’re a bosom buddy or a close family member, don't use the telephone to
contact the bereaved. A phone call is more likely to disrupt than assist the
grieving person, particularly if the bereaved has to explain again and again
the details of his loved one’s demise.
Your
handwritten message of support is not the place to request explicit details of
the love one’s passing. If you don’t have all the details at the time you write
your letter, rest assured you’ll be filled in eventually as to what happened.
The goal of your letter is not to cause the survivor to re-experience the pain
and suffering of his loss over and over again, but to step up beside the
survivor, empathize in the sadness and confirm your dedication by means of
support.
How To Comfort A Grieving Friend
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