Do you listen more than you speak? That’s an important question to ask yourself often. I’ve always been a good listener. However, being slow to speak and slow to wrath have not always been my best qualities. I love how this passage from James 1:19-20 is entitled: Qualities Needed in Trials.19So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath; 20 for the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God. (James 1:19-20, NKJV)
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Swift to hear
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Slow to speak
· Slow to wrath
Take a moment to think about those three qualities.
Ask yourself if you are swift to hear, slow to speak, and slow to wrath. The Thomas Nelson Study Bible breaks this passage down – with these three qualities – and shows how they embody the message of this book of James. You can read more about being swift to hear in James 1:21-2:26, slow to speak in James 3:1-18, and slow to wrath in James 4:1-5:18.
The study of Bible notes continues with the following:
“If a believer gets angry in difficult circumstances, the practical righteousness of God will not be evident in his or her life. When someone wrongs us, the natural reaction is to retaliate, at least verbally (see v. 19). But this response does not glorify God. Holding one’s tongue, trying to understand the other person’s position, and leaving vindication to God – demonstrates godly love in tense situations (Romans 12:17-21).”
I can relate to James's passage, and the Thomas Nelson Study Bible notes. I’ve mentioned before in my other articles that I struggled for a long time in my twenties with anger issues. I grew up in a dysfunctional home and learned that yelling was how to handle things. However, God has done great work in my life through the years.
Being swift to hear, slow to speak, and slow to wrath are three qualities I’ve learned to cultivate throughout my walk with the Lord. I’ve learned how to become more emotionally and spiritually mature. I’ve learned how to respond maturely rather than react immaturely and irrationally to people and situations.
It was sometimes challenging.
Yet, the following steps helped me to develop those qualities and become more emotionally and spiritually mature.
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Developed a solid daily Bible reading time
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Focused on prayer and worship each day
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Learned how to understand my personality
· understood that I need to understand people better
· Sought encouragement and help from accountability partners
Three books that helped me during this time—aside from the Bible as my primary source and guide—were the following:
1.
The DNA of Relationships by Dr. Gary Smalley
2.
The Five Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapman
3. Deadly Emotions by Dr. Don Colbert
Do
you listen more than you speak?